It can be the most unexpected things in life that end up harming you. You might expect that I’d be sent to the hospital because of car crash or some object falling from above when I’m in the city or I don’t know what, food poisoning maybe. But none of those are what got me in the end. The culprit that laid me out was: my garage.
That’s right, a garage broke me. Apparently, malfunctioning garages cause a lot of injuries, so at least I’m not alone.
Mine happened because of three incidents in one. Like most garages, I have an opener that is supposed to make the door go up and down at the click of a button. I keep it on my keychain. It’s always been reliable. Also like most garage doors, my garage has a sensor that should tell it when an object is in the way of the door coming down. Finally, just like most garage doors, my garage has a mechanism to make it go up and down slowly so no one can get caught underneath.
I’d like to say in my defense, that all of these three things have always worked perfectly. There was no warning that my garage door was out to get me. I did not receive threats in the mail from my garage door. We never had an argument. As far as I knew, we hardly thought of each other. I clicked my button, and the door opened or closed. That was the extent of our relationship. Or so I thought. It turns out the garage was just biding its time.
It turns out the garage door must have held a serious grudge because two days ago, I was out removing some leaves that had blown in. The door was open, of course. For some reason or other I had my keys in my pocket, and perhaps—perhaps—I accidentally hit the button the first time. The door started coming down regardless. I pulled it out, hit the button again to reverse course, which it did for a moment.
I suppose the door then realized its moment had arrived. I was standing directly underneath, inspecting the thing as if I had some expertise to explain the erratic behavior. It was then that the door struck. Down it came full force. It got a bump on the head, fell backward, and it landed on my leg.
Thankfully, my murderous garage door failed in its overall intent. I survived the encounter with some very deep bruises.
So, off to the hospital I went to get things checked out. Luckily, no breaks and no skull fracture. I guess I had a harder head than expected, which slowed the fall of the door. As you can expect, I’m not feeling great, though.
I’ve got a mechanic out today to have a talking to with my garage door, and to find out who put it up to this act. Apparently, there are lawsuits for this kind of thing, assuming the door really did break down without warning.
I’m just worried how I’ll be able to repair my relationship with the door.Read More